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February 6, 2012

Some Things I Love About My Little Brother

Filed under: Uncategorized — thirdxlucky @ 5:44 pm

Somewhere on a bus between Denver and Las Cruces, NM, Rebecca receives a text message…

L’IL BRO: Yo. So I’m trying this whole “sit at a bar” thing. So far: pretty stupid πŸ™‚

ME: Lol. Yeah, I’ve never been able to get the hang of that thing. Does it really happen outside of jokes and movies? Keep me updated.

L’IL BRO: Well so far the big excitement is that there’s a dude next to me eating a sandwich.

ME: I’m trying the whole “sleep on a bus” thing, but not really getting the hang of that either. πŸ˜› They’re showing Return of the Planet of the Apes.

L’IL BRO: Sleeping on Greyhound is fucked. – T.S. Elliott

ME: “So, a man walks into a bar, sits down and orders a sandwich…”

L’IL BRO: Turns out the punchline is really not that funny…

ME: And there’s this dude sitting next to him on his cellphone, just txting and txting away…”

ME: [Insert rest of joke here.]

ME: Punchline: “DUDE, I’m texting my SISTER!”

L’IL BRO: I don’t think that’s even sufficient to get punched. Maybe, I’m texting YOUR sister?

ME: I don’t have a sister, dude.

L’IL BRO: And then I found $5? Thing is, that still wouldn’t cover the cost my beer.

[LATER]

ME: So why are you sitting in this bar, apart from the fact that it’s rife with comic possibilities?

L’IL BRO: πŸ™‚ Long story, but basically what happened is my ex told me I should go to a bar and I listened.

ME: Hah. Okay. Maybe *that’s* the punchline…

L’IL BRO: Still not funny!

ME: It’s postmodern!

L’IL BRO: Your mom is postmodern. How are the Apes on a Bus?

ME: Fairly disappointing. Mostly because I originally thought they were about to show Dune.

L’IL BRO: You could tell the driver you’ve had it with these motherfucking apes on this motherfucking bus

ME: πŸ˜€ !

L’IL BRO: You know, the thing I like about talking to you is I can count on you having the same dumb sense of humor I do πŸ˜€

[EVEN LATER]

ME: You still at that bar?

L’IL BRO: Yeah, it’s not quite as awesome now ’cause the guy is done with his sandwich.

ME: Damn. So now what’s he doing? What do other ppl do at bars?

L’IL BRO: Allegedly they talk to each other but at the moment it looks mostly like an expensive way to drink beer and watch the Lakers

[AND FINALLY]

L’IL BRO: Ok, I’m done. On my way home to watch Heroes and pass out on the couch (like I been doing since high school.)

ME: Alright. Sleep well. Thanks for keeping me digital company on my long and lonely late night bus ride. πŸ™‚ I love you.

L’IL BRO: ‘Course. Love you too.

ME: P.S. Heroes wasn’t on when you were in high school, dude.

L’IL BRO: Right?

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